People Over Points

I remember with clarity my first day of Law School – even though it was decades ago (my son would jest, “one million years ago” – I’m sure in love) – but some moments stay with you.  I was sitting in an orientation and a professor offered a small public service announcement of sorts.

You are about to embark on a journey where you will learn and hopefully excel in skills of communication, negotiation, and persuasive argument. I caution you not to use these skills on your friends and family or they will, inevitably, cease to be your friends and family.

The piece of advice has stuck with me mostly in times when I catch myself in the middle of an argument, where my instincts have taken over, and I somehow forget I am talking to a human being I love and not merely a point to win.  Even though I often tell my own two sons to remember “people over points,” I am not the best role model of this principle in action.  Indeed, it has been a harsh lesson to learn throughout my adult life as I’ve sown seeds of bitterness, defensiveness, and insecurity in my wake.

This time of year, as we grow ever closer to "Election Day" in America, and the family holidays thereafter, I feel we all need to re-think whether we remember "people over points". That is why November is the perfect time of year for our new series entitled “In One Peace.” The Bible is clear:

“If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all people." Romans 12:18.

This does not mean we must force people to get along with us or that it is solely our responsibility… instead, it means to do our part – our piece to keep the peace.  It means to let go of winning, let go of the grudge, and let go of power.  Jesus reinvented power and greatness in preaching a message of power through selfless love. A completely upside-down concept in this world where we often seek blood and vengeance, He came not to destroy the lives of men, but to save them. (Luke 9:56).

How much truer is this with our closest and most precious relationships?  Those with our parents, our siblings, our friends, and our family in Christ.  The ones closest to us have the ability to cut us the deepest (and vice-versa) and sow seeds of bitterness, insecurity, and despair. Sometimes our “peace” is to sit with God and check our motives in our hearts, heads, and tongues.  Sometimes our “peace” is to confront in truth and love.  And other times, our “peace,” is to know what not to say. 

I may have learned how to “win” an argument in Law School, but I learned the crucial lesson of love from Christ... and I’ll admit I’m still a work in progress. 

Whether you struggle with gentleness and kindness, or you’re lacking in courage to confront and reconcile – conflict is inevitable.  It is crucial we all learn how to Biblically do our “peace.”  Check out our new series HERE.

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DID YOU KNOW?

• Bridges to Orthodoxy’s Crossroad’s Collection (MS and HS) contains 4-years of themes rotating between Social, Bible Study, and Orthodox topics.

• We upload these rotations on a cycle so that we can continue to update the content and keep the materials culturally relevant. 

• “In One Peace” was previously released in September 2020. This new 2024 version includes culturally relevant updates, graphics, and deep content.

Any Church who previously purchased and downloaded the prior 2020 version will receive a free download link to this newer 2024 version!

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